Energy vampires: how to escape
If the source of an energy attack on the street or in the supermarket is enough to move away, then from colleagues at work or domestic vampires there is nowhere to go. The main problem - to recognize the negative emanating from the seemingly close ones of these people, is sometimes quite difficult.
The first and main sign of energy vampires is that they do not experience any discomfort from their behavior: they are already accustomed to themselves, for them such behavior is the absolute norm, only you will always suffer
It is not necessary that only a colleague who loves gossip very much will not be such a bloodsucker in your life. Any person can become a vampire, causing you a feeling of discomfort. His main goal is your negative emotions (by the way, pity can be attributed to negative emotions), and all you can do is complain to others. Very often all your communication rolls over to this.
Those who are lucky, on that and go. No matter how I watched the people to whom such ticks clung,always came to the conclusion that they clung to them for one reason: the inability to say “no” and to defend their comfort zone. I understand that to say a categorical "no" is not always appropriate and correct in many situations of life. But Russian is rich in many definitions, isn’t it?
Consider the situation.
Two adult sisters, both have children. One of them works, the other can afford to do only the household. And the working sister got the habit of “throwing” her children on any school holiday to a disabled sister. She did not like this, it broke her plans, distracted from other equally important, than the working sister's affairs, but it was uncomfortable to refuse her. This lasted for several years, until the unfortunate did not arrange a serious scandal. And this could have been perfectly avoided if she had said only a few words to her working sister: “Well, I will take your children, but for a certain time, until it breaks my plans.”
Teach yourself to say: "Yes, but ..." - and be sure to expose your conditions. This is also great at work. To teach yourself to say no, try first to take a pause with the phrase: “I will think about it first, before giving you the answer.”After some waiting, your disagreement will be perceived by an opponent with not so negative overtones. And you will be surprised how quickly everyone will become accustomed to your “no”, and you, in turn, will stop overly taking care of the “freeloaders” and sympathize with those who use it.
And here are some more effective methods of protection from vampires:
- Do not look into the eyes, well, if possible, of course;
- abruptly change the topic of conversation and begin to actively gesticulate, knock the interlocutor with a thought, so to speak;
- try to abstract and show with your whole appearance that you are hovering in the clouds;
- take any closed pose, for example, cross your arms or legs, and imagine that there is an object of the wall type between you;
- and finally, just laughing, translating the conversation into a joke, this is what knocks them down from their black business the most.
In the end, it's only your life - make it so that it is psychologically comfortable.
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